Reese could smell the cooking. She debated if she should join everyone in the dining room or not. Simon might be there. He was angry enough that she was sure he'd kill her if he were given the chance. She could not puzzle out what had made Simon so angry.
Was it how closely I was dealing with the Tower? Was it the talk of diablerie? Was it the fact that I said something about Xaviar? What was the touchy subject?
Reese shrugs and decides to give it a go, anyhow. She slips into the room, "Smells good."
Simon hops down off the counter he was sitting on, "Well, I am out of 'ere. Pleasure seeing you all."
Reese watches as he gives her a half nod, his discomfort obvious as he leaves the room.
He calls over his shoulder, "Jimmy, let me know if you need anything, mate."
Reese feels her insides collapse.
Isn't it bad enough that right now I am wondering if joining the Tower is more likely to keep the Free State safe or not? Do you really need to snub me like this? Honestly, I came here to Praeco's because my faith was slipping and I was slipping away from the Movement. Whatever your problem is, it's not helping. I already feel like I am on the outside looking in. You just make things worse. Then again, I am beginning to think you are right.
For a split second Reese feels herself as Rapunzel being led to the Tower and it sees a lot more inviting than the Movement.
Reese frowns and says quietly, "Don't worry all. I will be leaving soon. I have business that needs attending to and I have little interest in invading the space again."
Reese feels sorrow and has a passing thought that she is trespassing by even existing and always has.
It's not as thought this is a new feeling. Only my Father understood.
Esther spoke up, "Dr. Reese, please allow me to apologize for my... for Simon, I believed that I have spoiled him so much that he has forgotten his manners."
No, I don't think he has. I think he is right to reject me. It's appropriate. It's why my sire embraced me, after all.
Reese is so lost in thought she misses Esther's invitation for a chat as she rambles on, shaking her head, "No, this is his space and I am invading it. He is within his rights. I don't intend on causing issue again. This is a safe space for him and I've made it something other than that. I have a beautiful home in Allston to return to. I have members of the Tower to meet with and discuss deals made that need to be followed through on. I have people to feed, building to rebuild, fires to look into. My list is long. Besides, I've already imposed too much. I have other ways I can learn and I'd rather pay the prices involved in learning than to impose again."
I won't have you all be like my mother.
Some hurt is betrayed on Reese's face and she forces a smile, "Whoever cooked, it smells wonderful. What is it all?"
I can be self-sufficient. I was for years. I don't even enjoy this existence that much. I just want to be able to help people.
The conversation continues and both Esther and Esperanza try to reassure her that coming to the Forge is the best place to learn and that it's Praeco's space, but Reese just keeps reflecting on the feeling of being on the outside looking in.
Sometimes I think that the age of a kindred really has no bearing on their psyche. Sometimes I think it has more to do with the age someone was when they were turned.
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